How to build a startup without suffering
The full breakdown to learn to manage negative emotions when building a company
The Tony Robbins interview with Alex Hormozi is something we weren’t expecting.
Basically, Tony tore down a bit of the facade Alex had built in his social media presence.
This image was built around the idea that suffering is necessary in order to build something valuable.
For most startup founders, building the company is the hardest thing they ever did in their lifes and they end up suffering for the most part of the journey.
In this clip, Naval explains the only thing he would’ve done different if he could go back in time is suffering.
“I would’ve done the same thing but with less anger, less emotion and less internal suffering. Because that’s all optional”
Now, pain is not optional but suffering is one of the games your mind plays to stop you from doing hard things.
Now, how can we as enterpreneurs do things with less suffering and still succeed?
Here’s the full breakdown 👇
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1) The real split isn’t duty vs enjoyment. It’s push vs pull.
Tony reframes the whole question:
Push motivation = willpower, obligation, “I have to,” anger, proving people wrong.
Works. But it burns you out and caps your ceiling.Pull motivation = service, meaning, “I get to,” a mission that’s bigger than you.
Works longer. And makes the same work feel lighter.
Founder takeaway:
If your engine is mostly push, you can still win. But eventually you’ll feel what Hormozi describes:
execution stays, emotion leaves.
Your output doesn’t drop. Your aliveness does.
2) Your words are literally training your biochemistry
This is one of the most practical parts of the conversation:
Tony argues that the labels you use become the emotional reality you live in.
“Duty” vs “Opportunity”
“Have to” vs “Get to”
“Starting over” vs “Starting fresh”
“Depressed” vs “down / frustrated / overwhelmed”
Founders should treat language like product UX:
If the UI is bad, behavior breaks.
If your internal vocabulary is bad, your state breaks.
Action (5 minutes): Vocabulary audit
Write down the 10 phrases you repeat most when you’re stressed.
Then rewrite them as:
Opportunity language (“I get to…”, “This is the training…”, “This is the game…”)
Specific language (swap vague doom words for precise descriptions)
You’ll be shocked how much of your “burnout” is just bad labeling.
3) High performers hit a fulfillment set-point (and don’t notice)
Hormozi describes something founders rarely admit:
The 10th testimonial doesn’t hit like the 1st.
The 100th doesn’t hit like the 10th.
Familiarity kills the magic.
Tony calls it the law of familiarity: even the best things become “normal” if you don’t deliberately re-associate.
Founder takeaway:
When you scale, you lose emotional contact with impact because:
you’re insulated by team/process
you’re managing abstractions (dashboards, numbers, “users”)
your brain reduces everything into “expected”
So you win the business game and quietly lose the meaning game.
4) The cure isn’t “more rest.” It’s a moonshot that forces new identity.
Tony’s answer is basically:
You don’t need a vacation.
You need a bigger game.
His example: feeding a billion meals, then escalating to a 100B meal challenge, then going deeper into “in the trenches” work.
Founder takeaway:
A real moonshot has 3 properties:
Unreasonable scale (forces strategy upgrades)
Emotional specificity (you can feel who it helps)
Personal association (it connects to your story, not someone else’s idea of virtue)
This is key: Hormozi wrote charity checks and felt nothing, then felt guilty about feeling nothing.
Tony’s point: that’s normal.
If it’s not connected to you, it won’t light you up.
Action: Moonshot prompt
“What moment made me feel most alive and capable?”
“Who else is stuck right before that moment?”
“What would it look like to help 100,000 people cross that line in 24–36 months?”
5) “Get out of your head” becomes real when you name your parts
This was unexpectedly useful.
Tony gets Hormozi to split into identities:
“Analytical Alex” (pattern recognition, execution, control)
“Anabolic Alex” (play, humor, connection, life)
Founders: you already do this unconsciously.
The unlock is doing it on purpose.
Action: Identity selection (daily)
Before a hard block (sales call, performance review, product decision), decide:
“Which version of me is leading this?”
Then act like it’s a role you step into.
This sounds cheesy until you realize it’s exactly how elite performers compete.
6) Opportunity selection: a simple filter you can actually use
Tony’s decision filter is clean:
Do I have passion for the mission? (Would I do it even if economics were secondary?)
Do I like the people? (Do I want to be in the arena with them?)
Is there real capability/track record? (Can this actually win?)
And then do deep diligence to avoid “3–5 years of pain.”
Founder takeaway:
Most founders reverse it:
chase “good opportunity”
ignore people/fit
pay for it later
His sequence is the right one: meaning → people → ability → diligence.
7) The line every founder should steal: achievement is a science, fulfillment is an art
Hormozi is world-class at the science:
systems
leverage
execution
compounding
Tony’s critique is that he’s under-invested in the art:
connection
play
emotional range
joy as a priority, not a byproduct
Founder takeaway:
If you don’t schedule fulfillment, you won’t “accidentally” find it.
Because your operating system will always default to what got rewarded: output.
So treat fulfillment like a KPI.
Not as in “fake gratitude journaling.”
As in: design constraints that force a better life.
Examples:
2 hours/week of “real world impact contact” (not donating, being there)
1 non-work obsession that creates novelty
1 moonshot goal outside your P&L
Hope this was valuable for you all, and want to see you building those huge companies withtout suffering!
Let’s go.
-Guillermo